Villas wrote on Tue Sep 29, 2020 10:54pm:
Hi tebo53. (as your original OP) I was intrigued with your post ( & have addressed it before).
Manners & Politeness are viewed from which view-point right across the world. I only concentrate on this forum, which is mainly involved with "English" speaking in this country. I do take with a pinch of salt from either sides of Spanish speaking & English speaking overseas....
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I have (after well over 25% of my adult life) been involved in Spain & my extended family, much longer.
Ignoring, (in our modern world of forums, internet, Alexa & messaging), concentrate on the differences of both sides. I have (this week & on this forum) both received & witnessed "English" ( as is:spoken language) "supposed" attitude.
Many Spanish have asked me, Why do others say eg:"Excuse me, if you wouldn't mind passing me the salt, please if you don´t mind?" when we sitting at table just indicate or say, "salt" & continue the conversation.
Respect, as earned, is in Spain assumed, (in my experience). It seems, to me, for many moving here into Spain, seem unaccustomed that assumed respect, when, eg: entering a shop/post office.....whatever, most will turn & will wish you a good day & offer any help they can. If we can offer that on eg: forums, we can promote respect, in whichever way we view "manners" & "politeness".
(In my opinion.)
V
I would echo this. When my family first moved here - a Very long time ago, although I subsequently returned to UK for most of my life - I was very kindly asked to join a family supper by the parents of my then Spanish boyfriend. He would correct and help with my mangling of the Spanish language and general accepted modes of behaviour. At this supper I asked if someone would please pass me the salt - to which the reply was to the effect that in Spain there was no need to surround the request with please/thank you etc because amongst friends and family there was absolutely no need; it was accepted that you would be given that for which you have had asked, why would you not be?
Where I used to live in UK, there was an institution used by firms with international Clients and businesses; it’s purpose was to familiarise employees who were to have dealings abroad with the specific customs of the area to which they were going to avoid inadvertent faux-pas. I understand that also the Police used it on occasion, to help officers understand the mores of different cultures especially f they were moving into an area with high ethnic differences.