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Finding a new social life

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Posted: Tue Jun 4, 2019 5:01pm
24 replies643 views9 members subscribed
Shaunagh56

Posts: 14

Location: Gran Alacant

2 helpful posts

I bought in Gran Alacant in late 2016 with my partner of 20 years, sadly he died suddenly in December 2017.  I now come to Gran Alacant alone and am struggling to meet new people. I have worked since the day I left school apart from a couple of years  when I was raising  my children. I divorced when they were very young and had to go back to work. I worked solidly after that until I decided to take early retirement in October 2018.  Up to that point my social life had been around toddler group and the other mums when the children were small, then work colleagues and family thereafter. I don’t know how to make/ meet new Friends as a singleton.   I have lost who I am as my job was where I was most comfortable and am spending too much time at home alone.  I am not a sporty person but would love to find a new interest, a dance class for instance, group outings, quiz nights etc or just someone to pop to Mercadona with or visit the beach on occasion.  I am spending too much time alone and need to change this.  My biggest issue is that  I  don’t drive so I am limited in where I can go.  I need help starting again.  I am not a wimp and .i am not shy talking to strangers but I need to find something that we have in common.  I can chat, some say too much, I am a little creative - I knit and crochet and have recently started up-cycling wooden furniture. I enjoy social gatherings and am a very proud “abuela” with two grandsons and two more babies due in October/November. I am learning Spanish, mostly self taught but now  have a weekly Spanish lesson with a tutor.  I really want to build the Spanish life that everyone talks about but finding it is slow  going. All suggestions greatly received.  If you can identify with my situation am happy to meet up and swap notes - male or female.  Thanks. Shaunagh

cp

cp

Helpful member

Wed Jun 5, 2019 5:33am

Posts: 117

Location: La Mata

77 helpful posts

Posted: Wed Jun 5, 2019 5:33am

Hi.  Try joining the Facebook group Ladies of Spain.    It is friendly and informative and has members from all over Spain.    Many members organise social events in their local area too.  If there is nothing local to you why not set up a coffee morning yourself and see who comes?   ( I did in my area - found a local restaurant willing to accommodate us- and create events on the Facebook group roughly once a month. Usually around  10 ladies come along each month - a great way to meet local ladies ). 

Kimmy11

Kimmy11

Super helpful member

Wed Jun 5, 2019 9:31am

Posts: 1256

1388 helpful posts

Posted: Wed Jun 5, 2019 9:31am

Hi Shaunagh and welcome!

Have you been to your local Ayuntamiento (town hall) or cultural centre?   Their facilities are often used for these sorts of activities - a friend of mine has just joined a sewing group at her local town hall.

I hope you don't mind me saying, but I'm really impressed that you've remained in Spain after the sudden loss of your long-term partner and I admire your attitude to making it work here for you.

Very best wishes,

Kim

Shaunagh56

Shaunagh56

Original Poster

Wed Jun 5, 2019 11:31am

Posts: 14

Location: Gran Alacant

2 helpful posts

Posted: Wed Jun 5, 2019 11:31am

Thanks , I thought of this but I am not a permanent resident, though often here 6-8 weeks at a time, till brexit curtails my visits, so not sure this would be practical.  Not rules it out though.  

Shaunagh56

Shaunagh56

Original Poster

Wed Jun 5, 2019 11:41am

Posts: 14

Location: Gran Alacant

2 helpful posts

Posted: Wed Jun 5, 2019 11:41am

Kim, haven’t been to the townhall yet, but off to the local library later today as they do organise some things from there I am told. Spain has been my dream for a long time, for the lifestyle and health benefits so I  won’t give up but sometimes it is very lonely watching others enjoying what I am trying to achieve and I don’t speak to another human for days/weeks ( not counting shop assistants). I am told a lot of ladies “do it alone” but many of them lived inSpain with partners/husbands so have  already made friends etc  before becoming single again.  . I know it can be done so I will just have to push on!. Appreciate your input. 

Cathiejstead

Cathiejstead

Helpful member

Wed Jun 5, 2019 9:21pm

Posts: 270

269 helpful posts

Posted: Wed Jun 5, 2019 9:21pm

Hi Shaunagh

I'm so sorry for your loss and think you're very brave to stay in Spain.

Please don't take this the wrong way but if you go to your local Samaritons  966 765 970 they have a list charities that need help. I know they were looking for people to train for one of the help lines.

I really admire your honesty. Stay strong and possitive. 

Cathie 

Shaunagh56

Shaunagh56

Original Poster

Wed Jun 5, 2019 9:46pm

Posts: 14

Location: Gran Alacant

2 helpful posts

Posted: Wed Jun 5, 2019 9:46pm

Brillant idea! This may be what I need, thanks for the input.  

m44ryt

Wed Jun 5, 2019 11:16pm

Posts: 101

Location: Aspe

21 helpful posts

Posted: Wed Jun 5, 2019 11:16pm

You sound a lovely person.

I’m sure you will be fine. 

Be strong, you will find your dream xxx

jocla0107

Thu Jun 6, 2019 8:54pm

Posts: 36

Location: Gran Alacant

31 helpful posts

Posted: Thu Jun 6, 2019 8:54pm

Hi Shaunagh

I am going to the library in Gran Alacant on saturday morning for intercambio.  This involves 45 minutes speaking in Spanish and 45 minutes speaking in English.  At the moment there is only a few of us and I am the only English speaking person!  If you are here in GA at the moment why not come along at 11.30 am ?  Please don’t worry if your Spanish is very basic, the Spanish people will be delighted to converse in English.  I’ve only been a few times myself but we have had a laugh! 

Best wishes 

Anne 

Shaunagh56

Shaunagh56

Original Poster

Fri Jun 7, 2019 1:14pm

Posts: 14

Location: Gran Alacant

2 helpful posts

Posted: Fri Jun 7, 2019 1:14pm

Oh thanks Ann, I think I will come along. . Not sure I can hold a conversation for 45 minutes though! And my skills are still very very basic!

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