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Let’s please all keep this nice.

Posted: Thu May 14, 2020 10:33am
170 replies5835 views19 members subscribed
french martini

french martini

Super helpful member

Posts: 2167

1491 helpful points

Location: Playa Flamenca

Joined: 12 Nov 2016

Can I start by saying that I am saddened by the amount of topics being closed down, deleted, blocked etc. 

Why is everyone ganging up on people? One person comments on a post and others feel the need to jump on them turning a perfectly innocent comment around. 

I sadly read Graham’s exit post this morning and there were some nice responses and some were down right rude. As I read it RayD commented that he didn’t want Grahame to leave and what I saw after this was just horrible, he was turned on in the blink of an eye with some calling his comment “ironic” From what I read there was no irony in the post, he genuinely did not want Grahame to leave and to re consider, why did members jump on him? It’s just not fair.

Can we PLEASE have some peace and can we please keep this post open and talk like ADULTS to each other nicely without having it closed or deleted. 

If you want to talk together and try and resolve this openly then let’s leave this post open and let’s talk calmly and be respectful of others. No name calling, no silly remarks and ganging up and talk about what we want to achieve TOGETHER. Who knows, it might work if we give it a try. 

I HAVE OPENED A POLL TO SEE MEMBERS THOUGHTS ON “HELPFUL VOTES” AND THEIR STATUS THAT GOES WITH IT. PLEASE VOTE. 

Nicola. 

 

Let’s please all keep this nice.

Results
29%
56%
15%
Total votes: 93
To vote in this poll please login or register.

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John56

Posted: Thu May 14, 2020 10:37am

John56

Legendary helpful member

Posts: 2605

3632 helpful points

Location: La Zenia

Joined: 7 Jul 2016

Posted: Thu May 14, 2020 10:37am

I have to say I am so tired of what the Forum has turned into, I have been on here for about four years and never known it so bad, little wonder people are leaving.

Web Designer Guy

Posted: Thu May 14, 2020 10:44am

Web Designer Guy

Helpful member

Posts: 211

378 helpful points

Location: Relleu

Joined: 6 Feb 2020

Posted: Thu May 14, 2020 10:44am

A few "legendary" users seem to have adopted a holier than thou attitude, talking down to pretty much anyone who doesn't agree with them, appointing themselves as general social police, making snide condescending comments and generally being knobs. My guess is that this is the problem of late.

I suspect that this new approach from some is due to lockdown madness setting in; people need to let off stream and online forums are the only place to do it for many. I don't think there is anything personal in it, and certainly judging by some people (persons) comments on some threads similar to this one, they don't even realise that they are the problem.

I think everyone just needs to give everyone else some space and accept that not everyone is coping with the present times, and so they should perhaps be offered support and help, no matter how vicious they get. 

I should add I'm not including Jim in with the "legendary" users mentioned above. Jim is a legend, full stop.

Just my opinion.

french martini

Posted: Thu May 14, 2020 10:49am

french martini

Original Poster

Super helpful member

Posts: 2167

1491 helpful points

Location: Playa Flamenca

Joined: 12 Nov 2016

Posted: Thu May 14, 2020 10:49am

Web Designer Guy wrote on Thu May 14, 2020 10:44am:

A few "legendary" users seem to have adopted a holier than thou attitude, talking down to pretty much anyone who doesn't agree with them, appointing themselves as general social police, making snide condescending comments and generally being knobs. My guess is that this is the problem of late.

I suspect that this new approach from some is due to lockdown madness setting in; people need to let off stream and online forums are the only place to do it for many. I don't think there is anything personal in it, and certainly judging by some people (persons) comments on some threads similar t...

...o this one, they don't even realise that they are the problem.

I think everyone just needs to give everyone else some space and accept that not everyone is coping with the present times, and so they should perhaps be offered support and help, no matter how vicious they get. 

I should add I'm not including Jim in with the "legendary" users mentioned above. Jim is a legend, full stop.

Just my opinion.

I’m glad I’ve got people talking at least. It’s good. Nicola. 


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John56

Posted: Thu May 14, 2020 10:53am

John56

Legendary helpful member

Posts: 2605

3632 helpful points

Location: La Zenia

Joined: 7 Jul 2016

Posted: Thu May 14, 2020 10:53am

Web Designer Guy wrote on Thu May 14, 2020 10:44am:

A few "legendary" users seem to have adopted a holier than thou attitude, talking down to pretty much anyone who doesn't agree with them, appointing themselves as general social police, making snide condescending comments and generally being knobs. My guess is that this is the problem of late.

I suspect that this new approach from some is due to lockdown madness setting in; people need to let off stream and online forums are the only place to do it for many. I don't think there is anything personal in it, and certainly judging by some people (persons) comments on some threads similar t...

...o this one, they don't even realise that they are the problem.

I think everyone just needs to give everyone else some space and accept that not everyone is coping with the present times, and so they should perhaps be offered support and help, no matter how vicious they get. 

I should add I'm not including Jim in with the "legendary" users mentioned above. Jim is a legend, full stop.

Just my opinion.

As someone you has been "given" the Legendary Member tag by the forum the whole situation has left me wary of giving an honest answer to a question which then is construed as a negative response because someone does not like the reality of the situation and then the abuse starts being directed to me or others. If things don't change I can see many more members heading for the exit like Graeme has done.

french martini

Posted: Thu May 14, 2020 10:54am

french martini

Original Poster

Super helpful member

Posts: 2167

1491 helpful points

Location: Playa Flamenca

Joined: 12 Nov 2016

Posted: Thu May 14, 2020 10:54am

John56 wrote on Thu May 14, 2020 10:37am:

I have to say I am so tired of what the Forum has turned into, I have been on here for about four years and never known it so bad, little wonder people are leaving.

Do we have any ideas that may help the forum be a better place? 

I don’t just mean, stop the vile comments, I mean any suggestions etc. 


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UKHandyMan4Hire

Posted: Thu May 14, 2020 10:58am

UKHandyMan4Hire

Very helpful member

Posts: 679

661 helpful points

Location: Aspe

Joined: 22 May 2018

Posted: Thu May 14, 2020 10:58am

@Nicola Well done for raising the issue. 

I must admit, I too got drawn into an online 'fight' to some degree, having made a post which was intended to help people, I felt I became under attack. I know facts were being stated and very often we do not want to hear bad news or reality, however, especially under the current stressful circumstances, I do find that there is a time and a place for everything. 

I would urge people to consider to carefully think about their words, (text!), before making comments. It is not how things are said, it is how they are received and we should all consider that when making a post or a response.

With all that in mind, despite the debate I got into, I must say that people do not get the helpful kudos status they obtain by always being difficult, so I thank those people for making their contributions.

We all know when we have some 'mischief' or 'devilment' in a post, myself included, and perhaps now really is a time to fulfil the spirit on which this forum was created - to be a helpful place for all. 

I have been close to leaving on a number of occasions, however, I am drawn back not for companionship or to go out of my way to make life difficult, intentional or not, I come back because the forum is a very helpful place with a lot of good people wanting to genuinely help.

Stay safe everyone and #BeNice !

french martini

Posted: Thu May 14, 2020 11:19am

french martini

Original Poster

Super helpful member

Posts: 2167

1491 helpful points

Location: Playa Flamenca

Joined: 12 Nov 2016

Posted: Thu May 14, 2020 11:19am

John56 wrote on Thu May 14, 2020 10:53am:

As someone you has been "given" the Legendary Member tag by the forum the whole situation has left me wary of giving an honest answer to a question which then is construed as a negative response because someone does not like the reality of the situation and then the abuse starts being directed to...

... me or others. If things don't change I can see many more members heading for the exit like Graeme has done.

Ok on that note I would like members to vote In the poll. It seems that the votes cause a lot of drama and I decided to see what people actually think. I’ll send it to Alex afterwards. 

GET VOTING 🙂


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french martini

Posted: Thu May 14, 2020 11:20am

french martini

Original Poster

Super helpful member

Posts: 2167

1491 helpful points

Location: Playa Flamenca

Joined: 12 Nov 2016

Posted: Thu May 14, 2020 11:20am

UKHandyMan4Hire wrote on Thu May 14, 2020 10:58am:

@Nicola Well done for raising the issue. 

I must admit, I too got drawn into an online 'fight' to some degree, having made a post which was intended to help people, I felt I became under attack. I know facts were being stated and very often we do not want to hear bad news or reality, however, especially under the current stressful circum...

...stances, I do find that there is a time and a place for everything. 

I would urge people to consider to carefully think about their words, (text!), before making comments. It is not how things are said, it is how they are received and we should all consider that when making a post or a response.

With all that in mind, despite the debate I got into, I must say that people do not get the helpful kudos status they obtain by always being difficult, so I thank those people for making their contributions.

We all know when we have some 'mischief' or 'devilment' in a post, myself included, and perhaps now really is a time to fulfil the spirit on which this forum was created - to be a helpful place for all. 

I have been close to leaving on a number of occasions, however, I am drawn back not for companionship or to go out of my way to make life difficult, intentional or not, I come back because the forum is a very helpful place with a lot of good people wanting to genuinely help.

Stay safe everyone and #BeNice !

I’ve started a poll. Get voting Will x


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Movingon

Posted: Thu May 14, 2020 11:27am

Movingon

Super helpful member

Posts: 1585

1242 helpful points

Location: Albatera

Joined: 7 Feb 2018

Posted: Thu May 14, 2020 11:27am

IMO the biggest problem with this forum is rooted in the lack of any sort of effective search facility meaning that time and time again the same old questions are being asked. 

Meaning no disrespect to the poster and attacking noone this post absolutely typifies that.

The information requested has been posted I don't know how many times  yet cannot be found with the search function provided.  

A small core of members stalking others seemingly for no other purpose than to attack their every post isn't helping.

Edit: in the time it's taken to write this this question has cropped up yet again, can you really blame people for getting just a little bit fed up of repeating the same old information over and over again? 

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